Wednesday, October 10, 2007

ME!

As this blog indicates, I just want to be me. Not what EVERY OTHER DAMN person wants of me. I can only live up to so many expectations (and THAT isn't all that easy). I like the saying "You can please some of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time" But there is another one... equally good "I Can Only Please One Person Per Day. Today ain't your day and tomorrow ain't lookin' good for you either". I can't seem to please ANYONE lately. Least of all myself. And isn't that how it's supposed to work? To do things to please OURSELVES first? I guess that is difficult to achieve when you are too busy trying to please everyone else at the same time. The shitty thing there is, how do you prioritize who you try to please first? I mean, there has to be a chain there somewhere right? There aren't enough hours in a day to do EVERYTHING that seems to be expected of me. Let's see, I broke my foot, had to deal with Dr's and hospitals for xrays, and meetings for work, and family... no wait.. not a lot of that here for me now. Let's see, what else? Oh yea, my kid, and homework, and laundry, and cleaning, and making dinner, and making lunches for school, on top of working all day. Oh, and let's add to that I have a cold now and I can't breathe. I have friends that need help with a computer, or a phone, or a whatever... I really need to stop everything I do, and just hang out with ME for a while. But then of course, you will all think I am a selfish bitch. This isn't me bitching about how busy my life seems to be, ok, yea it is.. but it's my fault. I really don't know who reads this, but I have an idea, and this relates to every single one of you... somehow. Not MY time / energy per se.. but you can relate. I don't think you'd be human if you didn't.

"
If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am not for others, what am I? And if not now, when? "
Rabbi Hillel
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