Lemme give you an example. Say there is someone in your life who is constantly making digs at you or just cuts you down all the time. There is a multitude of ways to handle this. One, you can do as I have in the past and return all of the snide remarks and digs with even more of my own to further escalate the bullshit. Which, in my personal opinion, after much experience with it, SUCKS ass. However, I believe I have "seen the light" if you will, about how to handle people in my life. I have made personal changes within myself to assist others in how to treat me. First, I can see that it has helped a lot, BUT it has helped me (directly) as well. I am slowly learning to control my OWN temper and not have such a short fuse. This is very good for me. I am also learning to hold my tongue. THAT is huge.. apparently, not everyone wants to know my opinion... and what I feel I need to say doesn't always matter.
So, I've noticed in people around me, that since I am trying to change me... that in turn is slowly changing them as well, and how they treat me. It's not fun to make digs at someone and not get anything back from them.. that gets old and boring, and thus they stop. I know, rather elementary school-ish, but hey.. it's working and I'm happy.
"Live the life you love.... "